Deeper'n'Ever Pie Recipe!

[bloodyrosemccoy]

Like most of my contemporary third-grade literati, I was a big fan of Brian Jacques' Redwall books, epic tales of the high adventures of mousies and their fellow woodland critters. They were an entirely new kind of fantasy for my narrow little brain in that they were almost completely devoid of magic--only a little bit of possibly mystical reincarnation, if that--but by god they were full of humor, swashbuckly swordfighting, heroic stunts, dastardly villains, colorful allies, and vivid settings.

And of course there was the food porn.

Oh, GOD, the food porn. I remember reading that Brian Jacques grew up in England during World War II, and if he wasn't exactly starving, there was never quite enough food, and what there was had an uninspiring quality to it. So he took to reading cookbooks like they were porn, and always lingered on feast scenes in the stories he was reading. And when he wrote his own stories, there was always at least one feast, with loving attention paid to describing every single dish on the menu. Holy shit when Mom read those books aloud to us we would get SO DAMN HUNGRY.

And the centerpiece of the food, for me, was always the moles' signature dish, the Turnip'n'Tater'n'Beetroot Deeper'n'Ever Pie. God DAMN that thing sounded good. In those days there was no Redwall Cookbook, and there MIGHT have been Redwall.net but the internet wasn't A Thing yet, so we just had to make up our own recipe. Mom tried many variations, but it wasn't till I came across a different book, Maggie Black's Medieval Cookbook, that it all came together. I combined her recipe for mushroom pasties with my own Deeper'n'Ever Pie recipe and voila! THE GREATEST FOOD EVER.

And I always celebrate Hobbit Day with one, because I think the hobbits and the moles would probably agree on what makes a damn fine savory pie, especially with the addition of mushrooms. So I'm gonna share my recipe with you, and if you want to celebrate a couple of great books with some great pie, be my guest!

Deeper'N'Ever Pie - Hobbit Variation

What You Need:

1-2 potatoes, peeled and small diced
1-2 carrots, peeled and small-diced
1-2 beets
1/2 lb mushrooms, sliced
1 small onion, chopped
2 cups cheddar cheese, shredded (well, to taste. I like cheese)*
extra-virgin olive oil
1/2 tsp. mustard powder
salt
pepper
2 pie crusts (I use Pillsbury because while I am good at some kitchen things, pie crusts are MYSTERIOUS ALCHEMY)

What You Do:

Preheat the oven to 350F.

Parboil the beets whole, until they are soft, in one saucepan. When they are done, peel them (they're easier to peel after they've been boiled) and small-dice them, then toss them in a big mixing bowl

While that's going on, parboil the chopped carrots and potatoes in another saucepan. Drain them and dump them into that same mixing bowl

Lightly saute the onions and mushrooms in olive oil. Add them to the bowl

Now toss the vegetables till they're good and mixed. Mix in 2-3 tablespoons olive oil, 1/2 tsp. mustard powder, and dashes of salt and pepper.

Mix in the shredded cheese.

Now put one of the pie crusts in your pie pan. Then dump the filling in!

Cover with the other pie crust. Pinch the crusts' edges together. Punch a few holes artistically in the top crust with a fork.

Bake for 30-35 minutes.

Ta-da! You have an amazing Deeper'n'Ever Pie to share with your friends. Mom likes it with sour cream (Mom likes EVERYTHING with sour cream), but I like it plain. Maybe with an apple beer or some ginger ale, or some mulled ginger apple cider if you have it on hand. But no matter how you serve it, enjoy--and raise a glass of whatever you're drinking with it to Brian Jacques, who wrote some amazing books. Here's to you, Mr. Jacques.


*I have no idea where the moles got cheese. Only bad guys seem to eat meat in the Redwall universe; the good guys WILL eat fish when it's available, but they're mostly vegetarian. They're only vegan because they have to be, though--I think there's a passing mention of cattle in Redwall itself, but that was the first one published and the continuity got retconned so there is no good source of milk. But by god Jacques wants cheese and cream and butter, so he cheats with something called "greensap milk." I'm cheating right back with "actual milk" products.

Comments

[dark-phoenix54.livejournal.com]

Dammit. I am now starving and want that pie. I do not have beets or pie crust. Or energy and ambition.

I agree with your mother. This sounds like it would be divine with sour cream.

[beccastareyes]

Meat-eating becomes a lot more suspect when you live in a world where all mammals, birds and reptiles are sapient, self-aware and so on. You can go with insects (and a lot of the birds do, IIRC), but I suppose Brian Jacques wanted his food porn without recipes for locust fritters.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

Exactly! Especially since he tends to cast the predators of larger vertebrates as the bad guys--the snakes, cats, mustelids, rats, etc. And the "good" predators are still kind of dangerous, like the badgers.

Obviously the actual dietary preferences of the animals was not a primary concern, since if it were, the moles' pies would contain a lot more grubs and worms. But it did provide a guideline.

I suppose I could get into a long thoughtful critique of the division of good and bad in this world, but the hell with it, he's just using it as shorthand and they're still darn fun reads.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

... On the other hand, it would be kind of interesting to explore the moral dilemma of an obligate carnivore in a world where EVERYTHING might be sapient, or IS sapient, which would definitely explain the "fuck it" attitude of the predators in Redwall.

[beccastareyes]

Yes. (I do recall that one of the cats managed as a fisherman in Mossflower, but it seems like Jacques made the decision that fish were usually considered safe.)

I do wonder about the otters, since they were portrayed as a lot safer than badgers, let alone other mustelids.

Now I wonder if some of that exists in fanfiction.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

I guess it's because otters generally prey mostly on fish and seafood, which aren't possibly sapient--though they are a BIT tougher than the mice etc. generally, but not necessarily berserkable.

In Redwall the centerpiece of the feast is, in fact, the fish that lives in the abbey pond. I noticed he doesn't usually feature fish in later feasts, but it doesn't seem to be a contradiction.

[baroncognito.livejournal.com]

What sort of potatoes do you recommend for this?

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

Idaho, russet, Yukon ... I generally go with those.

[dandelion-diva.livejournal.com]

Oh *man* but that sounds good.

[gwalla.livejournal.com]

Yeah, in the original Redwall they implicitly live in a world where humans exist (the cart that Cluny's horde rides in on is human-scale, and IIRC St. Ninnian's is supposed to be a human church). That got dropped after the first book, and I think all mention of large animals ceased about the same time.