(no subject)

[bloodyrosemccoy]

Just took a call on Mom's iPhone, and I have a question: How the HELL do y'all manage to hear anything out of those buggers? It's built in the exact opposite shape to one you can put to your ear, and even when you do manage to maneuver it into the one position where the sound actually can enter your head--getting head crud all over it in the process--the speakers are terrible.

Maybe it's just some sort of disconnect I have with Apple products, but it seems really unwieldy. What gives?

Comments

[anagramofbrat.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the iPhone is actually a terrible phone. Which isn't so important for me, since I despise making calls (and have a headset/headphones for that anyway), but if actually talking to other humans is a thing, I wouldn't recommend it. Every time I've tried to use one by itself I've managed to accidentally hang up a call with my face.

[brightlotusmoon.livejournal.com]

My best friend says the same thing about hers. She rarely uses it to talk, and basically holds the damn thing in front of her face so she won't hang up with her cheekbone.


Luckily, Futurama understands.
Here is a scene from the episode "Attack Of The Killer App":

[Cut back to Fry, who is relaxing, when his head shakes and we hear a bell ringing. A telephone icon is shown on the eyePhone screen.]
Fry: What's happening to me? Is it puberty?
Bender: It's a phone call, dingus.
Fry: These eyePhones are phones, too?
Bender: Duh!
[Fry picks up the phone and on the screen is Leela driving the ship.]
Fry: Fry-lo.
Leela: [on screen] Hi, Fry. Did you know these eyePhones are phones, too?
Fry: Duh. Hey, is it safe to talk while you're flying?
Leela: [on screen] Oh, totally. This thing's hands-free. [takes out a taco] That's how I can eat this taco [takes out a fork with spaghetti in another hand] and this spaghetti.
[Wide shot of the ship's hangar. Leela accidentally crashes the ship into the building. She flies out of the ship onto the meeting table, screaming. She has spaghetti all over her face and hair and is still holding onto the taco.]
Leela: I'm hanging up now. [Fry and Leela touch their noses and hang up]
Bender: Hey, check out this Internet video of some idiot crashing her spaceship!
[Close up on Bender's eyePhone screen. He clicks play and opens a video of Leela crashing the ship.]
Leela: You recorded that?
Bender: The eyePhone records everything. All I did was add a laugh track and twit it to my 10,000 followers.
[Bender plays the video again, which now has canned laughter at the end of it.]

"Shut up and take my money!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EaHUpWuqNHY

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

God, I love Futurama.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

The only possible thing I would want an iPhone for is the app my sister has that exhorts her to exercise lest she be eaten by zombies, because if exercise were more like video games I would actually do it. If there were a Super Mario or Zelda style exercise app, I might buy an iPhone just to get it.

[dinogrrl.livejournal.com]

The answer: 'iPhone' is a misnomer. The end!

[van.livejournal.com]

I think the mistake you're making here is that you're using it as a phone, silly person! It's like a mini-tablet! If you want to actually listen to things on it, you have to plug headphones in.

[bean-bunny.livejournal.com]

Speakerphone.

[tinyplasticmeat.livejournal.com]

Precisely. The miniscule amount of time I ever use it as a *phone* is on speaker.

[mel-redcap.livejournal.com]

...am I the only person who's going to admit to having no problems with mine? XD I don't get HOW people can hang up with their faces, it disables the touchscreen when there's an active call and a cheek-sized patch of skin contact :P

[fadethecat.livejournal.com]

I don't get how people hang up with their faces, and yet I do, all the time.

The bit that actually annoys me is having to move the phone away from where I can hear things so that I can enter numbers when going through phone trees. But that's true for any cell phone that I'm not using with a headpiece, I guess, so I can't blame the iPhone in particular for that.