And I Thought Mine Were Bad

[bloodyrosemccoy]

And now, for some reason, we're watching Alien: Resurrection.

RIPLEY 7: K ... k ... ill ... me ...

RIPLEY 8: *FLAMES ON THE SIDE OF EVERYONE'S FACE*

RON PERLMAN: Must be a chick thing.

MY SISTER: Great line. Seriously, Ron? What, like she's on the rag?

*pause*

ME: Shit, that's a frightening thought.

MY SISTER: Oh, JESUS, you're RIGHT.

ME: THERE GOES ANOTHER PAIR OF PANTS

MY SISTER: GAME OVER, MAN

ME: THE AGONY

MY SISTER: I DISSOLVED ANOTHER TAMPON

ME: THE PLUMBING IS ON FIRE

MY SISTER: GIMME THAT FLAMETHROWER SO THAT I MAY DO MYSELF IN

ME: K ... ILL ... ME ...

MY SISTER: ... yeah, that would be a legitimate reason to call it 'the curse.'

ME: I am not even going to think about what this means for the womb-having Alien Queen Brad Dourif was blathering on about.

MY SISTER: Yeah, massive hull breach. Leave them in space for a while, and the whole alien problem pretty much solves itself.

Comments

[mel-redcap.livejournal.com]

...I just nearly choked on a jellybean while cackling hysterically XD XD XD

[gwalla.livejournal.com]

I kind of enjoyed it. It's a trainwreck of epic proportions, but it's got some cool bits and Ron Perlman.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

I love the angry-macho schoolgirl crush his character develops on Alien!Ripley.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

Must've been a clash of egos. I know Whedon's a serious control freak and feels that the mess the movie became was due to other poeple (because HE WROTE A PERFECT SCRIPT, DAMMIT.) But Jean-Pierre Jeunet does some wonderfully crazy surreal movies. It was just ... yeah, not a good combination at all.

I'm with gwalla. It's got good elements, but doesn't really come together. Also, it works better if you go in under the assumption that it's not actually an Alien movie, but some REALLY high-budget noncanon fanfic.

On the other hand, nothing can save Alien3. Now THAT was a bullshit movie.