Maybe McDonald's Is Hiring ...

[bloodyrosemccoy]

Y’all, I have no damn clue how that interview went.

I think I did all right, but I keep seesawing between that and thinking of the dumb shit that must have come out of my mouth at some point. I am completely at a loss in judging the reactions Nice Reserved Ladies have to whatever garbage I spew out in response to useless questions like “Describe your weaknesses.” (“Sometimes I work too hard and can be too much of a perfectionist! Ha ha!”)*

If only job interviews were more like internet memes. Ask me about cake vs. pie and I will be ready to defend my position with logic, rhetoric, sources, examples, and even dry-erase board illustrations. Come up with the wacky hijinks of Sherlock Holmes and the Phantom of the Opera? I could get you an elaborate scenario in a minute flat! But ask me to “provide examples of your creative problem solving,” and all I can think is “Durr, I can stack up boxes until I reach the banana.”**

Well, if I just blew this interview, at least my supervisor has offered me a consolation job boost. (Ooh, FIFTEEN hours a week! Hooray …) Still … woulda been nice.


*Damn it, I should have said I have trouble integrating my efforts with other people’s and require a lot of communication. Oh, well, next job interview, I guess.

**“And one time I totally figured out how to open a jar to get at the delicious candy inside! The secret is twisting.”

Comments

[tears-of-nienna.livejournal.com]

I hate hate hate that "weakness" question. From now on, when they ask me my weakness, my answer is going to be "Ben and Jerry's Phish Food." Because it's true, and also because a more honest answer would involve the word "introvert," and some people appear to think that's a synonym for "leper."

[stormteller.livejournal.com]

Last time I was asked that question, I went with the "work too hard" answer because I genuinely didn't know it was a cliche. Now, I would probably answer it with something like "I hate that freaking question. Is that a weakness?"

[alicetheowl.livejournal.com]

The real question they're asking when they ask that is, "What have you done to overcome something you saw as a weakness?" So if your answer is that you're an introvert, then you have to say something like, "I tend to be pretty shy in person or on the phone, but I can write really, really well. So, I collaborated with my co-workers so that they were the ones making phone calls, and I was writing up the newsletter or their business correspondence, so the company was able to put its best face forward in all of its methods of correspondence."

I'm a job coach, and introversion's been the millstone around my neck, too. Then they switched my job so that I didn't have to contact random strangers, and the job got a lot easier. Also, because I have to help people get jobs, I've studied up a LOT on interview techniques.

(Hi, here from metaquotes)

[tears-of-nienna.livejournal.com]

Oooh, thank you. That actually really helps--maybe I'll lead with the goofy response and then go for a serious answer. (I think you're allowed to answer things with humor if you're applying as a children's librarian...)

[alicetheowl.livejournal.com]

I should hope so. If it doesn't go over well, I don't think you want to work for them, anyway.

[tears-of-nienna.livejournal.com]

Exactly! It's testing them while they're testing me! :)

[alicetheowl.livejournal.com]

In theory, interviews are supposed to be your opportunity to evaluate the company as much as it's their opportunity to evaluate you. It doesn't usually work out that way, but that's the theory.

[songfire3.livejournal.com]

Gah. I know exactly how you feel - job interviews are just insane!

[kadharonon.livejournal.com]

After my whole school-related breakdown I suspect my answer to that question is "I have a hard time saying no to new projects, so I take too much on and refuse to ask for help because I'm too much of a perfectionist and hate relying on other people. And then I collapse and die."

Um. Yeah. Not the most confidence-inspiring thing.


I hate job interviews.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's definitely got to be something that is a flaw, but not a flaw that might interfere with productivity. ("Sometimes I burst into tears for no reason at all!")

And yeah, I really hate relying on other people. FOR GOOD REASON. I learned that from group projects in high school.

I had this running joke for a while with my brother where we'd ask to proofread each other's query e-mails--"Hey, dude, can you check this and make sure I didn't accidentally write "Fuck you" in the middle of this letter of inquiry?"

[kadharonon.livejournal.com]

Query/Cover letters are the other thing that really freaks me out. So much so that when I was ordered to apply for a job (by a former professor/friend) yesterday, and didn't manage to finish the cover letter by the time I saw her, she sat down and wrote most of it for me.

It is all perfectly reasonable stuff that I might write myself, I just couldn't WRITE it, or not without horrendous agony. I need to make a template or something.

And I've been putting off writing a "So have you hired someone for this job and just not bothered to tell anyone else who interviewed for it?" email for WEEKS.

Bluh.

[alicetheowl.livejournal.com]

Send a thank you note for the interviewer's time, and add in the note that you're still available for that job or any related one for which you may be qualified. Sometimes it's a test to make sure you're REALLY interested. And sometimes they're just twits with the attention span of a hamster.

[cougarfang.livejournal.com]

Advice that's served me well for the "weakness" question - pick a weakness that you have overcome, or have taken steps to overcome. So for instance I'd say, "I have a terrible crippling fear of public speaking, BUT for my Master's degree I had to TA a biology lab course, and having to stand up in front of a classroom of students and teach them the lab taught me how to overcome that fear!"

Nevermind that I did a pretty shit job and was dragged into the whole thing kicking and screaming and I still have a terrible crippling fear of public speaking. Just refrain from mentioning the ugly parts. XD;;

[sofish-sasha.livejournal.com]

I have a job interview in Norway in a few weeks, and I is a bit nervous. I've only been to one proper interview before, and I screwed that one up quite badly (I didn't really fancy the job anyway, but it still could've gone much better. Taking the right bus on the way there would've been a good start).

Anyway, this upcoming interview is in a small Norwegian town I've never been to, called Jessheim, and to get there I need to take the train from Karlstad to Kongsvinger, and then find the bus to Jessheim. And I've no idea how much time I have to play with, so to be on the safe side I'm leaving Karlstad at 05:45 in the morning. 8] Chances are I won't even fall asleep before it's time to get up...

On the plus side, if I manage to overcome all the logistic hurdles I'll probably feel all good and confident when it's time for the actual interview. Unless I'm all stressed out and frazzled. And I'm not the most brilliant person in the world when it comes to understanding Norwegian, but hey! it'll be all right.

I hope.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

Hoof, well, at least I theoretically spoke the same language as my interviewers! My ability to produce other languages, even those I understand, is about caveman-level. "ME WORK GOOD! ME SOLVE PROBLEM! ME PROMOTE SYNERGY!" (Come to think of it, that's about how I am in English, too.) I do not envy you, but I do wish you luck!

[stormteller.livejournal.com]

Next time someone asks you about creativity, map out that Holmes/Phantom scenario. Couldn't hurt.

[elvenmoon.livejournal.com]

When I was interviewing for a job, I was told to answer the weakness question with a positive. Like, "I can be a little shy but once I get to know a person I'm a lot more talkative." Something negative about you that can be fixed.

[gwalla.livejournal.com]

Mind if I metaquote?

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

Oh, sure. Might as well get something useful out of this!

[gwalla.livejournal.com]

Here you go!

[trillianastra.livejournal.com]

Oh, yeah, I've been there.

Hmm, I wonder if the HR department at my office would mind organising interviews like memes... actually, no, they're not that smart. Neither do they have that much imagination.


(here via metaquotes)