bloodyrosemccoy: (Boneitis)
[personal profile] bloodyrosemccoy
Today’s installment of Ailments You Never Even Would Have Suspected Might Exist:

Athlete’s Boob.

Yes, it is yet another drawback to having boobs that florp down over the skin of one’s torso—apparently my sub-mammarian region is warm, moist environment capable of supporting life. Sort of like deep-sea vents, except instead of studying it to determine the myriad exciting ways life can support itself, I am trying to destroy the whole ecosystem with spray-on athlete’s foot powder,* because sometimes Science takes a back seat to OMGWTFKILLITBLARGH. If that doesn’t work I will have to move on to Plan B, which at this point involves that staple of all movies where you have to kill the alien life form: flamethrowers.

As you can imagine, I’m rather hoping Plan A works.


*The can says “Family Size,” which makes me kind of nervous, to be quite honest.

Date: 2009-11-23 03:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] padparadscha.livejournal.com
Nah, then you'd just have gauged nipples, like those stretched earlobes from years of heavy earrings.

It'd look badass, though!

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