The Life Experience ~ Spring '09

[bloodyrosemccoy]

What I Learned Since The Spring Equinox

• My sister thinks my lack of desire for a mate is weird.
• “Anhedonia” is the medical term for an inability to feel joy.
• Wasps are the god damn SUPERVILLAINS of nature. Now, I knew that some wasps were disgusting monstrous horror-movie-inspirations from the very depths of your worst nightmares, but I didn’t realize the sheer variety of horrifying parasitic atrocities they’d commit against trees, grass, spiders, butterflies, and beetles.*
• Wyoming and Colorado state laws require you to move to the left lane when you see someone on the shoulder.
• While Star Trek TOS is almost entirely made up of homoerotic moments, the winner of all the episodes I’ve seen was “Mirror, Mirror.”
• Octavia Butler is even more rocking than I was led to believe. Took me way too long to find one of her books.
• Mark Hamill can do three different crazy laughs.
• Bill O’Reilly writes kids’ books. I didn’t need to know that.
• When stroked, alligators can be sedated. They also make a hilarious warnk sound before they do.
• Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome perfectly describes my bedtime habits, and is in fact very, very difficult to treat. Take that, people who think I’m just not trying!
• It’s almost nice to find out you have a “disorder,” because at least you know you’re not a one-of-a-kind freak.
• In the world of my aunt, dark wizards and lawyers are apparently always hovering around little old ladies just waiting for them to have heart attacks. That’s why it’s imperative that it be kept secret from everyone, including, preferably, most of the little old lady’s children.
• Your hips have to be forward for front stance in tae kwon do. I’ve been doing it wrong for years.
• Even one stellar job interview doesn’t guarantee you the job.
• There’s a really nice section of Salt Lake City off on the other side of Downtown that I never knew existed—and which I should keep in mind for whenever I want to actually move out.
• I am not the only person in the world who thinks Strunk & White were full of shit! Yay!
• Bad movies based on good books touch a serious nerve in people.
• Uhura’s first name is Nyota.
• Arc flash is an ionization of the air around an electrical system with sufficient voltage and no grounding. It’s an impressive and unfortunate cause of death among electricians.
• Wire-wrap jewelry is pretty straightforward in its basics, but mastering it is less easy.
• There is such a thing as an antidepressant that works without making me fall down
• The life of a Mormon missionary is even more regimented and awful that I could have imagined. You’re never even supposed to be out of sight of your partner. I realize this is probably in order to keep missionaries out of mischief, but that doesn’t make me feel any better.

*I am of the strict mammalian opinion that being eaten from the outside in is fair, and the proper sequence of events is 1. Kill, 2. then eat. If that happens to me I’m bummed but figure, well, fair play. But eating alive, and/or from the inside out, is definitely a foul.

Comments

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

I know, right? I've got it under the title Lilith's Brood, which isn't half as cool, but it's the same story so bleah. I'm on the last book now.

My only problem with the Oankali was the coercion and force--their alien point of view clashed with my view on human rights. Which was, of course, part of the point. But if aliens had offered it to whoever wanted some tentacle babies, I'd be all over the offer. Which interests me, because I'd be curious to see why the Oankali didn't find any geeks among the humans who were like, "Are you ALIENS? FUCK YEAH! WHERE DO I SIGN UP?"

[vorindi]

But would such a reaction have met their qualifications for sanity and stability, or whatever it was they were looking for?