Big Eclipse Adventure Trip, On My Own Edition

So I went on another Eclipse Adventure!

THE BIG TOTAL SOLAR ECLIPSE OF 2017

ME: Wow, I would have to go slightly north to see totality! I am not up for a traffic-jammed road trip
ME: I volunteer to stay at the Space Place and do Eclipse Activities, allowing my other coworkers to travel!
ME: In exchange, I only ask for a suitcase full of money
SPACE PLACE:
ME: Or the next couple of eclipses guaranteed off
SPACE PLACE: eh, sure

PREVIOUSLY ON ECLIPSE ADVENTURE:

A traffic-jammed road trip!

THE NOT-VERY-CLOSE PATH OF TOTALITY

ME: Good news, bro! I'm gonna be in your direction! How about if I send you a map of totality and you pick a city to meet me in?
MY BROTHER: Oh, you want me to do a traffic-jammed road trip? I see how it is
ME: Also, I will be taking the train because air travel is LITERALLY THE WORST
MY BROTHER: Okay. How's Buffalo, New York sound?
ME: I dunno, how's the springtime weather in Buffalo?
BROTHER: Unpredictable. But you can see my new house and hang out with Burgie for a day!
ME: SOLD

So I bought a make-your-own-unicorn kit as an offering for Burgie and was on my way!

( FRIENDLY FACES EVERYWHERE; HUMBLE FOLKS WITHOUT TEMPTATION )