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bloodyrosemccoyDay off today! Mom and I decided to drive all over everywhere to shovel some sand—that is, run some errands. And, you know, some miscellaneous, too.
24-Hour Fitness
I still hate gyms. Everyone looks so angry and serious in them, and they make exercise into work. I think there’s something wrong with a culture where you have to drop everything and go climb stair machines in a dank, depressing dungeon filled with jerks. One of the reasons we have problems with physical fitness now is that our society is too convenient—we don’t get nearly enough incidental exercise.
I prefer to enjoy moving, which is why I go for walks in parks, swim, and do tae kwon do.
So while our extremely perky 20-year-old tour guide had more tricks and hooks and grabs to pressure us into joining than I even thought possible, we decided not to sign up. We would do our swimming elsewhere.
Public Pool Near 24-Hour Fitness
MOM: This place looks better!
AMELIA: Much better. Let’s get a membership here!
MOM: I like how they have the kiddie pool separate from the adult one.
AMELIA: Especially after walking past several signs enumerating the myriad rules designed to prevent you from crapping in the pool.
MOM: Let’s join.
Office Max
AMELIA: You know, it’s weird, but I love this store.
MOM: My god. You are such a nerd.
I got a whole set of fine-tip Sharpies in awesome colors. If you are not using lots of colored pens to write your novel, I feel you are doing it wrong.
Swimsuit Store
MOM: So let me get this straight—you’re buying a women’s suit and a men’s suit?
AMELIA: I refuse to wax or shave, and therefore I cover my legs. However, if I showed up in just a men’s suit, I would be summarily ejected from the pool even if I didn’t crap in it.
Pedicure Place
Okay, honestly I could care less about having my feet battered and buffed and abused, but I love colored toenails.
The pedicure lady remembered me from last time. She chimed in her opinions of my color scheme.
And Heather and her mom joined us, and we had a nice little impromptu party at the feet place.
Home
MOM: What will we have for dinner?
AMELIA: Well, last night the Dude and I were watching Throwdown With Bobby Flay, and they did these fancy gourmet sloppy joes with, like, vegetables and spices and garlic and other such ingredients.
AMELIA’S BROTHER: Yes. And we said to ourselves, “That’s nice—”
AMELIA: “—but you know, we could really go for a sloppy joe consisting of Manwich-drenched ground beef on a Wonder Bun.”
AMELIA’S BROTHER: So, in conclusion, there will be sloppy joes.
This has been a good day off.
24-Hour Fitness
I still hate gyms. Everyone looks so angry and serious in them, and they make exercise into work. I think there’s something wrong with a culture where you have to drop everything and go climb stair machines in a dank, depressing dungeon filled with jerks. One of the reasons we have problems with physical fitness now is that our society is too convenient—we don’t get nearly enough incidental exercise.
I prefer to enjoy moving, which is why I go for walks in parks, swim, and do tae kwon do.
So while our extremely perky 20-year-old tour guide had more tricks and hooks and grabs to pressure us into joining than I even thought possible, we decided not to sign up. We would do our swimming elsewhere.
Public Pool Near 24-Hour Fitness
MOM: This place looks better!
AMELIA: Much better. Let’s get a membership here!
MOM: I like how they have the kiddie pool separate from the adult one.
AMELIA: Especially after walking past several signs enumerating the myriad rules designed to prevent you from crapping in the pool.
MOM: Let’s join.
Office Max
AMELIA: You know, it’s weird, but I love this store.
MOM: My god. You are such a nerd.
I got a whole set of fine-tip Sharpies in awesome colors. If you are not using lots of colored pens to write your novel, I feel you are doing it wrong.
Swimsuit Store
MOM: So let me get this straight—you’re buying a women’s suit and a men’s suit?
AMELIA: I refuse to wax or shave, and therefore I cover my legs. However, if I showed up in just a men’s suit, I would be summarily ejected from the pool even if I didn’t crap in it.
Pedicure Place
Okay, honestly I could care less about having my feet battered and buffed and abused, but I love colored toenails.
The pedicure lady remembered me from last time. She chimed in her opinions of my color scheme.
And Heather and her mom joined us, and we had a nice little impromptu party at the feet place.
Home
MOM: What will we have for dinner?
AMELIA: Well, last night the Dude and I were watching Throwdown With Bobby Flay, and they did these fancy gourmet sloppy joes with, like, vegetables and spices and garlic and other such ingredients.
AMELIA’S BROTHER: Yes. And we said to ourselves, “That’s nice—”
AMELIA: “—but you know, we could really go for a sloppy joe consisting of Manwich-drenched ground beef on a Wonder Bun.”
AMELIA’S BROTHER: So, in conclusion, there will be sloppy joes.
This has been a good day off.
