bloodyrosemccoy (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bloodyrosemccoy) wrote2011-10-18 09:28 pm
bloodyrosemccoy) wrote2011-10-18 09:28 pm
Entry tags:
Scenes from Mouseland
The first thing I found out about Disneyland was possibly the weirdest, too: I have never been there, and yet I knew my way around. No, it’s not some eerie “I’ve been here before” feeling, neither. It’s because I’ve freaking played Epic Mickey. Turns out the areas in that game weren’t just kind of inspired by Disneyland—they actually matched the layout of Main Street, New Orleans Square, Tomorrowland, etc.. It was … kinda strange, frankly.
ME: I have this overwhelming urge to squirt paint everywhere.
MY BROTHER: Me too. At least we aren’t trying to use thinner.
ME: Unless we get ambushed by that rocking Phineas and Ferb truck again. I am totally willing to melt them.
---
My Favorite Spot, Unsuprisingly, Was Tomorrowland
ME: Innoventions! Dream House! I AM SO THERE!
MY BROTHER: Engineering stuff!
MY SISTER: *sad puppy eyes* Rides?
ME: THE FUTURE!
*we explore the carousel Dream House, brought to you by innovative companies of THE FUTURE buy their stuff!*
ME: Dig! Bedrooms! Of THE FUTURE!
MY BROTHER: Kitchen! Of THE FUTURE! … But where are the cake-baking robot hands?
ME: Impractical computer screen dining room table! Of THE FUTURE!
EXASPERATED CAST MEMBER: You guys realize that all this technology is available now, right?
ME: And you realize this means we’re LIVING in The Future, right?
Cast Guy was not amused. Fortunately, later we found an enthusiastic Cast Girl who was all over Living In THE FUTURE, so that’s okay.
---
I kept getting drawn toward this thing. Not to ride it, just because it’s pretty. Hundertwassery, even!
---
Now, since LucasArts and Disney are BFFs, there’s a harsh truth one must accept about the park: at some point, your ass WILL get whacked by a lightsaber. And when I say “your ass,” I mean “my ass.” And when I say “my ass,” I mean “MY ACTUAL ASS.” Some enthusiastic young Padawan was swinging his new lightsaber around, because it’s a lightsaber dammit, and somehow it got away from him and full-on collided with my backside.
ME: Can I help you?
PADAWAN’S MOM: OMG I AM SO SORRY MA’AM BILLY QUIT WAVING THAT THING AROUND AND APOLOGIZE TO THE LADY
ME: Yeah, Billy! Apologize!
PADAWAN: mrblwrglsorry
ME: And put your shoulder into it next time.
PADAWAN: *blank stare*
PADAWAN’S MOM: You’re lucky, Billy. If she was someone else, you could be in Big Trouble.
ME: Yeah, Billy. But even if I were someone else, I should probably realize that WE’RE IN DISNEYLAND, packed end-to-end with wired-up uncoordinated children, and a plastic lightsaber bludgeoning is all part of the package.
---
Halloween At Dizney: Beware Of Orange Thing
SOME MOM: So, are you going to get lots of candy?
9-YEAR-OLD MINNIE MOUSE: I’m going to get ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND pieces of candy!
ME: Dang! Are you going to eat all of it?
MINNIE: Yeah! And I’m gonna do all the Halloween things, even Space Mountain! (solemnly) They changed it for Halloween, you know. There’s an orange thing.
ME: I saw that orange thing! It was pretty creepy, all right.
MINNIE: It’s okay. I’m just going to close my eyes at it.
SOME MOM: She’s been practicing by watching it on Youtube.
ME: That’s probably a good strategy.
MINNIE: No orange thing’s gonna get me.
ME: That’s right! You show that orange thing!
Other, less scary orange things:
I tellya, I’m coming back at Xmas someday. That shit must be CRAZY.
---
The Haunted Mansion Manic Holiday
ME: Good grief. I have never seen Halloween garlands that look gorgeous.
ME: But I am a bit troubled by the ominous Jack Skellington décor.
HOUSE: LA LA LA LA LALALA LA! THIS IS HALLOWEEN! GRIM GRINNING GHOSTS COME OUT TO SOCIALIZE! MAKING CHRISTMAS!
ME: What is this fuckery? This is not the Haunted Mansion! This is the inside of Tim Burton’s head!
MY BROTHER: I’m okay with that.
---
My sister wore this previously-acquired hat all week, making her darn easy to spot. There’s a sticker on the front with Peter Pan on it, which she touched up with a ballpoint pen at some point. The painstakingly written “FUCK YEAH” on it became a problem when we discovered that everyone in the universe wanted her hat. Guess they don’t make them anymore. They’d ask to examine it, and she always swept it off with a flourish so that her hand covered the sticker.
---
My linguist powers tell me this is a pretty straightforward cipher. Hell, if you cross your eyes, you can read it.
This was part of the Indiana Jones ride, which my sister's buddy insisted we go on. Turns out she had good reason. Dang what a fun ride.
---
ME: Say, what have we here? Looks like somebody went to the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique.
SMALL PRINCESS: I did! And my fairy godmother helped me with my hair!
ME: That explains the sparkles, all right. Say, Dude, why don’t you go to the Boutique?
MY BROTHER: Because I’m wearing a hat.
ME: Nonsense. I for one completely support your transformation into Princess Sparklebeard.
MY BROTHER: Well, I would look good in a tiara.
---
A Very Late Birthday Present For My Brother
STORE GUY: I see you are interested in a collection of our fine Halloween-themed TOOTHPICK HOLDERS!
ME: Well, I didn’t get my brother a birthday present, so when his eye was caught by Monster Mickey and Witch Tinker Bell on these shot gla—
STORE GUY: —TOOTHPICK HOLDERS—
ME: —TOOTHPICK HOLDERS, he was all for them. He has a lot of toothpicks.
STORE GUY: Yeah, somehow toothpick storage is a particularly complex conundrum. A lot of folks keep coming back for more of these holders. *naughty grin* I just love that I sell these here in Toontown.
ME: Hang on. You realize you’re a few yards away from the Roger Rabbit ride, right?
STORE GUY: I’m wondering how long that’ll last. We never moved any Roger Rabbit merchandise. Kids don’t know about it.
ME: Probably that’s good news. But I dunno, Baby Huey seems to really enjoy lining up those TOOTHPICK HOLDERS.
STORE GUY: You have a point. … I see you also bought a Mickey shirt.
ME: I couldn’t find an Oswald one.
---
And, alas, that was my one regret for the trip. An Oswald shirt is even more elusive than a happy Donald shirt. But if that’s the one tragedy of the trip, then I’d say it was darn successful!
ME: I have this overwhelming urge to squirt paint everywhere.
MY BROTHER: Me too. At least we aren’t trying to use thinner.
ME: Unless we get ambushed by that rocking Phineas and Ferb truck again. I am totally willing to melt them.
---
My Favorite Spot, Unsuprisingly, Was Tomorrowland
ME: Innoventions! Dream House! I AM SO THERE!
MY BROTHER: Engineering stuff!
MY SISTER: *sad puppy eyes* Rides?
ME: THE FUTURE!
*we explore the carousel Dream House, brought to you by innovative companies of THE FUTURE buy their stuff!*
ME: Dig! Bedrooms! Of THE FUTURE!
MY BROTHER: Kitchen! Of THE FUTURE! … But where are the cake-baking robot hands?
ME: Impractical computer screen dining room table! Of THE FUTURE!
EXASPERATED CAST MEMBER: You guys realize that all this technology is available now, right?
ME: And you realize this means we’re LIVING in The Future, right?
Cast Guy was not amused. Fortunately, later we found an enthusiastic Cast Girl who was all over Living In THE FUTURE, so that’s okay.
---
I kept getting drawn toward this thing. Not to ride it, just because it’s pretty. Hundertwassery, even!
---
Now, since LucasArts and Disney are BFFs, there’s a harsh truth one must accept about the park: at some point, your ass WILL get whacked by a lightsaber. And when I say “your ass,” I mean “my ass.” And when I say “my ass,” I mean “MY ACTUAL ASS.” Some enthusiastic young Padawan was swinging his new lightsaber around, because it’s a lightsaber dammit, and somehow it got away from him and full-on collided with my backside.
ME: Can I help you?
PADAWAN’S MOM: OMG I AM SO SORRY MA’AM BILLY QUIT WAVING THAT THING AROUND AND APOLOGIZE TO THE LADY
ME: Yeah, Billy! Apologize!
PADAWAN: mrblwrglsorry
ME: And put your shoulder into it next time.
PADAWAN: *blank stare*
PADAWAN’S MOM: You’re lucky, Billy. If she was someone else, you could be in Big Trouble.
ME: Yeah, Billy. But even if I were someone else, I should probably realize that WE’RE IN DISNEYLAND, packed end-to-end with wired-up uncoordinated children, and a plastic lightsaber bludgeoning is all part of the package.
---
Halloween At Dizney: Beware Of Orange Thing
SOME MOM: So, are you going to get lots of candy?
9-YEAR-OLD MINNIE MOUSE: I’m going to get ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND pieces of candy!
ME: Dang! Are you going to eat all of it?
MINNIE: Yeah! And I’m gonna do all the Halloween things, even Space Mountain! (solemnly) They changed it for Halloween, you know. There’s an orange thing.
ME: I saw that orange thing! It was pretty creepy, all right.
MINNIE: It’s okay. I’m just going to close my eyes at it.
SOME MOM: She’s been practicing by watching it on Youtube.
ME: That’s probably a good strategy.
MINNIE: No orange thing’s gonna get me.
ME: That’s right! You show that orange thing!
Other, less scary orange things:
I tellya, I’m coming back at Xmas someday. That shit must be CRAZY.
---
The Haunted Mansion Manic Holiday
ME: Good grief. I have never seen Halloween garlands that look gorgeous.
ME: But I am a bit troubled by the ominous Jack Skellington décor.
HOUSE: LA LA LA LA LALALA LA! THIS IS HALLOWEEN! GRIM GRINNING GHOSTS COME OUT TO SOCIALIZE! MAKING CHRISTMAS!
ME: What is this fuckery? This is not the Haunted Mansion! This is the inside of Tim Burton’s head!
MY BROTHER: I’m okay with that.
---
My sister wore this previously-acquired hat all week, making her darn easy to spot. There’s a sticker on the front with Peter Pan on it, which she touched up with a ballpoint pen at some point. The painstakingly written “FUCK YEAH” on it became a problem when we discovered that everyone in the universe wanted her hat. Guess they don’t make them anymore. They’d ask to examine it, and she always swept it off with a flourish so that her hand covered the sticker.
---
My linguist powers tell me this is a pretty straightforward cipher. Hell, if you cross your eyes, you can read it.
This was part of the Indiana Jones ride, which my sister's buddy insisted we go on. Turns out she had good reason. Dang what a fun ride.
---
ME: Say, what have we here? Looks like somebody went to the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique.
SMALL PRINCESS: I did! And my fairy godmother helped me with my hair!
ME: That explains the sparkles, all right. Say, Dude, why don’t you go to the Boutique?
MY BROTHER: Because I’m wearing a hat.
ME: Nonsense. I for one completely support your transformation into Princess Sparklebeard.
MY BROTHER: Well, I would look good in a tiara.
---
A Very Late Birthday Present For My Brother
STORE GUY: I see you are interested in a collection of our fine Halloween-themed TOOTHPICK HOLDERS!
ME: Well, I didn’t get my brother a birthday present, so when his eye was caught by Monster Mickey and Witch Tinker Bell on these shot gla—
STORE GUY: —TOOTHPICK HOLDERS—
ME: —TOOTHPICK HOLDERS, he was all for them. He has a lot of toothpicks.
STORE GUY: Yeah, somehow toothpick storage is a particularly complex conundrum. A lot of folks keep coming back for more of these holders. *naughty grin* I just love that I sell these here in Toontown.
ME: Hang on. You realize you’re a few yards away from the Roger Rabbit ride, right?
STORE GUY: I’m wondering how long that’ll last. We never moved any Roger Rabbit merchandise. Kids don’t know about it.
ME: Probably that’s good news. But I dunno, Baby Huey seems to really enjoy lining up those TOOTHPICK HOLDERS.
STORE GUY: You have a point. … I see you also bought a Mickey shirt.
ME: I couldn’t find an Oswald one.
---
And, alas, that was my one regret for the trip. An Oswald shirt is even more elusive than a happy Donald shirt. But if that’s the one tragedy of the trip, then I’d say it was darn successful!
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2) One of my friends works at the Jedi School - he is partially responsible for those kiddies runing around with lightsabers i guess ;)
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DANG Xmas at Disney would be awesome.
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I do miss the old Tomorrowland with the Peoplemover that rode through "the world of TRON" though. The main problem with the new Tomorrowland, though, is something they didn't change from the old one: apparently in the future there is no shade.
Did you go on the Jungle Boat ride?
Is the Haunted Mansion now Nightmare Before Christmas all year round or just for Halloween? Because I would be sad if they got rid of the old stuff.
Christmas is just about the only time of the year that It's a Small World is tolerable.
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They referred to it as the Haunted Mansion Holiday, so I think it's just for the holidays. I hope so. I'm not particularly fond of Tim Burton's head.
I didn't go on the jungle boat ride. Or Pirates of the Caribbean--it was closed. My only memory of it is from Disneyworld, and dangit I want to go back.
Didn't do It's A Small World, either. I'm still rather traumatized by the Epic Mickey game where the ride tried to kill me.
There's a nightly Tron rave at California Adventure. My sister has a souvenir glowy ice cube.
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Good news about the Haunted Mansion. I do like Tim Burton's head, some of the time, but I'd be distressed if they'd gotten rid of the usual Grim Grinning Ghosts.
Too bad you missed the Jungle Boat ride. You'd like it. It's all corny jokes and terrible puns. I think Pirates has been more or less ruined though, since they stuck Johnny Depp into everything. And they'd already kinda screwed it up by doing things like putting a platter of food on a woman's arms (so the pirate chasing her is really just after the food, you see).
The ride actually trying to kill you would probably make It's A Small World more bearable. As it is, it already tries to kill your sanity. Slowly.
The Tiki Room? The Matterhorn Bobsleds? Big Thunder Mountain Railroad? Star Tours? The Only Acknowledgement By Disney That "Song of the South" Ever Happened a.k.a. Splash Mountain?
Damn, now I kinda want to go to Disneyland. Maybe I can extend my SoCal trip for the Aikido nationals next year and take a detour to Anaheim...
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BECAUSE PIRATES LOVE FOOD. I liked the PotC movies, but somehow it seems obnoxious to put Johnny into the ride. But I guess at this point kids would probably get confused if Pirates of the Caribbean didn't feature their favorite characters from, y'know, Pirates of the Caribbean.
Big Thunder Mountain always makes me happy for its Utah roots. It also caused my brother and me to laugh hysterically rather than yell, but you had to be there to get just why.
I rather prefer the Grizzly Mountain Rapids in California Adventure for wet rides. I also like that they sell towels at the store next to it.
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Haunted Mansion Holiday runs from October-December, since it's very popular.
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Also, "Nightmare Before Christmas" does kinda cover both Halloween and Christmas.
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(Anonymous) 2011-10-20 02:58 pm (UTC)(link)no subject
Yeah, different orange thing. The orange thing I'm thinking of is an actual physical part of the ride, not projected.
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I only vaguely remember Disneyworld's normal Space Mountain. Probably different from this one, anyway. I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO COME BACK.
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However, since that's the last bend before they return to disembark, you can hear the sting when you're waiting in line, and some people obviously DIDN'T expect the last scare--there were some genuine shrieks. It was fun just for that.
(Also I like how one guy in the vid is yelling "Wooo!" in a rather perfunctory way, like he knows that's what you're supposed to do on roller coasters, but his heart's just not in it.)
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This is the inside of Tim Burton’s head! Heeeeee, yes! :)
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It was an excellent time, indeed.
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